Dear Diary (and everyone who reads this),
Maybe this is what I've been looking for. I'm at this crossroads where it's like "now or never." I look in the mirror and the image I see makes me think, "look what you've done to yourself." Meanwhile, my 8 month old smiles and me and just knows me as Mommy. I want SO BADLY to end this lose/gain cycle. I want her to grow up with a healthy mommy who loves to be active and who feels good about herself. Not one who's constantly trying to not look too fat in her clothes and suck her gut in. Getting this out is therapeutic and if anyone responds, please be kind. This feels like a beginning. There may be a lot of this for a while. Just be patient with me and let me get it out. Will tomorrow be the day I decide I'm worth it? I sure hope so. For now, I have a beautiful baby wondering why I'm not paying attention to her.
Bye for now :)
Maybe this is what I've been looking for. I'm at this crossroads where it's like "now or never." I look in the mirror and the image I see makes me think, "look what you've done to yourself." Meanwhile, my 8 month old smiles and me and just knows me as Mommy. I want SO BADLY to end this lose/gain cycle. I want her to grow up with a healthy mommy who loves to be active and who feels good about herself. Not one who's constantly trying to not look too fat in her clothes and suck her gut in. Getting this out is therapeutic and if anyone responds, please be kind. This feels like a beginning. There may be a lot of this for a while. Just be patient with me and let me get it out. Will tomorrow be the day I decide I'm worth it? I sure hope so. For now, I have a beautiful baby wondering why I'm not paying attention to her.
Bye for now :)
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